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13Now Brutus, since he had made the foremost men of Rome for dignity, family, and virtue, dependent on himself, and since he understood all the danger involved, in public tried to keep his thoughts to himself and under control; but at home, and at night, he was not the same man. Sometimes, in spite of himself, his anxious thoughts would rouse him out of sleep, and sometimes, when he was more than ever immersed in calculation and beset with perplexities, his wife, who slept by his side, perceived that he was full of unwonted trouble, and was revolving in his mind some difficult and complicated plan.
2Porcia, as has been said, was a daughter of Cato, and when Brutus, who was her cousin, took her to wife, she was not a virgin; she was, however, still very young, and had by her deceased husband[17] a little son whose name was Bibulus. A small book containing memoirs of Brutus was written by him, and is still extant. 3Porcia, being of an affectionate nature, fond of her husband, and full of sensible pride, did not try to question her husband about his secrets until she had put herself to the following test. She took a little knife, such as barbers use to cut the finger nails, and after banishing all her attendants from her chamber, made a deep gash in her thigh, so that there was a copious flow of blood, and after a little while violent pains and chills and fever followed from the wound. 4Seeing that Brutus was disturbed and greatly distressed, in the height of her anguish she spoke to him thus: “Brutus, I am Cato’s daughter, and I was brought into thy house, not, like a mere concubine, to share thy bed and board merely, but to be a partner in thy joys, and a partner in thy troubles. Thou, indeed, art faultless as a husband; but how can I show thee any grateful service if I am to share neither thy secret suffering nor the anxiety which craves a loyal confidant? 5I know that woman’s nature is thought too weak to endure a secret; but good rearing and excellent companionship go far towards strengthening the character, and it is my happy lot to be both the daughter of Cato and the wife of Brutus. Before this I put less confidence in these advantages, but now I know that I am superior even to pain.” 6Thus having spoken, she showed him her wound and explained her test; whereupon Brutus, amazed, and lifting his hands to heaven, prayed that he might succeed in his undertaking and thus show himself a worthy husband of Porcia. Then he sought to restore his wife.
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Notes
[17] Marcus Calpurnius Bibulus, colleague of Caesar in the consulship of 59 B.C.